In my defense your honour!!

This one will run and run!!( The drive not this post.)

A number of false allegations have raised and my DOGS honour has been impugned and I would like to put my side of the fairway/story.

Having suffered the slings and arrows in my new persona as "Colin the Choker" I stood tall on the 3rd tee despite the heartbreaking loss of a recent major. I had something to prove. Following a single ghost swing I unleashed the mother of all drives. It arched majestically onto the centre of the fairway, the crowd were hushed (primarily because there weren't any!). After a considerable hike I arrived at the ball's resting place. I called back to Charlie, who I could just make out further back down the fairway, that I was placing my ball back on the fairway in accordance with the local rule.

The insinuation that I would challenge the honour of a fellow "foundherdog" is potentially libelous. I happened, while attending the bar (in accordance with Rule 28) enter into a discussion with a few new found friends as to the quality and style of Charlie's huge drive. They agreed that it was an exquisite one but what about mine? Mine was a fraction longer I said but, sadly, on the pathway.The winning shot they said as the pathway was classed as ground under repair! Surely not I said. The fact that an extra barrel of beer appeared at these fine gentleman's party was purely coincidental!

Somehow contrary to DOGS tradition "what happens on tour stays on tour" (Rule 31) the matter was referred to the general manager instead of being passed up the chain of Command to our most gracious Chairman.

I obviously concur with all the new rules as so eloquently recorded although there does seem to be a little too much emphasis on Richard's Road. I place myself voluntarily in front of the DOGS disciplinary committee safe in the knowledge that at all times I attempted to uphold the lofty goals and aspirations expected of a "foundherdog".

I rest the case for the accused!